So I considered changing the subject line title for these emails (now blog) to "FAST-FORWARD" . You can imagine why - it would be nice (for me) to simply skip ahead to the spring. I am feeling quite ready for "them" to bring it on. Ok, maybe that's a little too Rambo, and perhaps I won't be feeling this way in a few weeks after I've already been infused. BUT, for me, the waiting is really THE worst part of all of this. While docs are preparing me for pain and exhaustion, patients have told me they haven't had as hard a time as was described to them before they began treatment. Don't know for sure yet, but I may be starting next week. All the docs keep saying, I don't need to change my Chicago travel plans or spring break. They keep telling me I can excersize as much as I feel like so that's what I/we plan to do. This is usually followed by the cheerful mantra, "Everyone is different". This statement is so ludicrous, I can hardly keep from laughing every time I hear it. Some people throw up green and some yellow. (Did you really want to hear my inner thoughts? Again, if you don't want to know me this well, just let me know and I can set you free from these updates). Whatever the color, it doesn't change our travel plans or whatever we can salvage of the next several months you earthlings call winter; and I'm feeling really good about that. I got a note just this very morning from an enthusiastic mom about another travel plan to look forward to - the next girl scout camp out in May. Hope it doesn't conflict with my future boob job.
Before I go further with my update (and sarcasm), I should really be sincere for a moment. I really want to thank you all for the many flowers, banana breads, kidnapping of our kids and good vibrations. This is all quite appreciated. At the moment, things are quite calm and basically normal. I'm sure I'll be looking for playdates in the future. Other things I'm looking for are good book or movie recomendations - they must be EXTREMELY funny or schi-fi, or both. I'll probably end up reading Harry Potter. At least I'll be culturally clued in. Right now I'm reading a David Sedaris book - Me Talk Pretty One Day. So far so good. Also, I'll just lay it on the line, if you ever feel like reaching out - you just can't go wrong with flowers. And please rest assured, I am so lucky to have all of you as friends to simply shoot the shit with. And you know I can shoot some shit.
So here's some recommendations for you. (It's only fair if I can trade). I think I mentioned that the last book I read was Bill Bryson's A Walk In the Woods, about his Appalacian Trail Hike. It was hysterical. His fear of bears, run-in's with other weirdo's on the trail and relationship with his hiking sidekick provided an amazing diversion. This was all wrapped together with a healthy dose of environmentalism and history. If you read it, we can talk about it.
Second, if you have not already been flooded with info about this, please look in your droors and bathrooms and check out the backs of your deoderant, lotion, soap and shampoo. Look for a suffix on some of the last ingredients that says "-parabens". You have a choice to buy products without them and even though the verdict is still out on them, why chance it. Parabens have been found in breast cancer tumors. Check out the links below and decide for yourself. Yes, there are other things we should probably know about our daily products, but here's something to start with. Normally, I poo poo such claims but since there IS a choice.
1. The Truth About Parabens
2. Parabens
So back to the update. The dating game is going well. I've now visited with 2 oncologists who have recommended the same exact treatment. I have one to go on Friday. Today, I'm getting a head to toe (PET CT) scan of my entire body. I'm looking forward to seeing that full body scan - that could be cool and a little sci-fi. Also, maybe I'll get to pee a little blue dye this time. I was told to get my teeth cleaned because, halotosis is a side effect from chemo. So maybe no one should ask me about my breath either. I'll buy some gum. I surveyed my first chemo room - which turns out to my surprise to be a community activity. I visited a huge room full of people sitting in brightly colored lazyboys and looking out big picture windows. This all seemed reasonable to me. I'm sure I'll be plugged into my ipod anyway. Also, last week I was "expanded" in the chest. I know you all noticed the difference immediately. It was a piece of cake and didn't hurt at all. In fact I couldn't even feel the fat needle. Every doc that looks at my "job" has said that it is very impressive and I'm a great healer. That makes me feel good. I'm not sure what else people want to know about this. Yes, I'll go to a wig shop and No, none of you can come with me. I may never wear it in front of you or maybe you'll pass me on the street and not recognize me. This reminds me of the time I returned to Atlanta after college with blonde hair and was able to hide from all my old high school chums for basically a year.
In other news, I presented a new planting design to some clients last along with my two gardening buds, Dana and Lauren. The clients were very pleased and full steam ahead. I have actually told them about my situation, given that they are older, sweet and oh, so patient. Even with all that, I have no doubt that their yards will come together without a problem come spring. I'm very excited about this one. It will be a woodland garden - no front lawn at all. I crammed it with many of my favorite plants, including a line of beautiful Sweetbay Magnolias.
So, let's end it there with Gardening at Night. I have a feeling you all will know a lot more about plants in addition to my smart-ass remarks by the time this is over. Sorry.
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